Weekly Focal Point: Detachment
“Detachment is not that you should own nothing. But that nothing should own you.”
~ Ali ibn abi Talib
Courage to Change Series
I think the word detachment is often misunderstood. For me, detachment is the freedom to own what is mine and to allow others to own what is theirs. This freedom allows me to keep my own identity and still love, care about, and identify with the feelings of others. In fact, I believe that the degree of our humanity can be measured by our ability to know another person’s pain and joy. I have been practicing the principles of Al-Anon to the best of my abilities for a long time. But when someone in the fellowship shares about having a difficult time, I can go right back to day one. I no longer live with that type of emotional pain, but I can feel theirs. I detach; I can identify without needing to remove their pain. To me, that is an Al-Anon success story. Today I don’t have to like everything my alcoholic loved one says or does, and I don’t have to change her, even when I think she is wrong. I continue to learn how to care without taking everything personally.
3 C’s of Al-Anon
- We didn’t CAUSE it
- We can’t CONTROL it
- We can’t CURE it
AND WE WON’T CONTRIBUTE TO IT TODAY
Questions to Consider This Week
- Can I commit to taking care of my own business while allowing others to tend to theirs?
- Do I understand that I can detach today without losing compassion?
- Will I seek direction and guidance to obtain the freedom in my own life even when that is difficult or uncomfortable?
- What areas of my life can I see small victories in, allowing others the space to feel what they may?