GIVING UP CONTROL
Today’s Reminder: Control
“Human beings, by changing the inner attitude of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.”
~ William James ~
Courage to Change Series
I’m learning to identify illusions that make my life unmanageable. For example, I wanted to stop controlling people and situations, but the harder I tried, the more I felt as if I were knocking my head against a wall. Then someone mentioned that I couldn’t give up something that I didn’t have. Perhaps I was trying to give up the illusion of control. Once I saw that my attempts to exercise power were based on illusions, it was easier to let go and let God. Another illusion is that I have a big hole inside and I must fill it with something from outside myself. Compulsively shopping, obsessing about relationships, trying to fix everyone else’s problems, these are some of the ways I’ve tried to fill this hole. Yet the problem is spiritual emptiness and must be filled from within. It wasn’t until I saw through the illusion that I was deficient and needed to look outside myself for wholeness, that I began to heal.
3 C’s of Al-Anon
- We didn’t CAUSE it
- We can’t CONTROL it
- We can’t CURE it
AND WE WON’T CONTRIBUTE TO IT TODAY
Questions to Consider This Week
- What are three areas of my life that I have an illusion of control over today? How have my attempts to master these areas on my own power failed me?
- Make a list of the people, circumstances and principles I want to control and submit those to your Higher Power in prayer and meditation. Watch for the relief that follows this submission!
- Can I identify ways in which I try to fulfill my spiritual emptiness through my career, relationships, hobbies or daily tasks?
- Will I commit to being grateful of the progress I am making in this process rather than shaming myself for the mistakes that will most certainly be a part of my recovery journey?