Weekly Focal Point:
“Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to when you are sick. Under any circumstances, simply always do your best and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.”
-Don Miguel Ruiz, Author of Four Agreements
The Four Agreements Series
The fourth agreement is rooted in balance. In family recovery we tend to see that our past shows a roadmap of overdoing, which leads us to feelings of depletion and frustration. On the opposite end of the spectrum, we may do less than our best and experience feelings of guilt or regret. When we allow events to unfold organically, we tend to naturally find a balance in doing our best. This begins to even out for us when we can clearly define the separation between our responsibilities and the responsibilities that belong to others. We are then able to give without expectation, allowing us to be more productive and live our lives intentionally. Our actions will bear more fruit when they are driven by our passions rather than an expected reward. The world around us may teach that action offers reward, but in the world of spirit, action offers alignment with the will of our Higher Power. When our daily living is in this alignment, we are able to find harmony in the journey without struggling for an expected outcome. This fourth agreement is what allows the other three to become deeply ingrained habits.
The Three C’s of Alanon
We Didn’t Cause It: Step one states, “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanageable.” Addiction is a chronic disease, and there is nothing we can say or do to stop our loved ones from using or drinking.
We Can’t Control It: Step two states, “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” We realize there is nothing we can do to control addiction. Instead, we seek a power greater than ourselves to rely upon, just as our loved one is doing.
We Can’t Cure It: Step three states, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” After we realize there is nothing we can do to control the addiction, we can begin putting it in the hands of our Higher Power.
Considerations for the Week
1. Do I often struggle to find my balance in my daily living by either overdoing it or not doing my best?
2. Am I in the habit of judging myself and feeling regret about situations that I wish I had done differently? Do I find it hard to let that go and strive to do my best moving forward?
3. Will I submit my frustrations, fears and feelings of guilt/shame to my Creator, asking to be shown ways to improve? Can I take those corrective measures to use constructively rather than a means to judge myself harshly?
4. Take a moment to write down the Four Agreements somewhere you will see them each day. (Be Impeccable with your Word, Don’t Take Anything Personally, Don’t Make Assumptions, Always Do Your Best). Pick up a copy of the book to read!
The Family Afterward Meeting
Next Family Afterward Meeting will take place, March 28, 2023 at 7 PM CST via Zoom.To join click the link below!
BRC Monthly Speaker Meeting
BRC Healthcare’s monthly speaker meeting is back! Join us April 8th for food, fellowship, and speaker Blake R. Doors open and dinner begins at 6:30 PM with the meeting beginning at 8 PM. This event is open to the general public and all in the Austin recovery community. We look forward to reconnecting with each of you in Mark Houston Hall.For those of you who are unable to attend locally, livestream over Zoom will be available.