Weekly Focal Point:
“God wants to preserve our souls. That is the role of boundaries; they define and preserve our property, our soul.”
-Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend, Authors of Boundaries
The Ten Laws of Boundaries Series
Law #9: The Law of Activity
Human beings are initiators and responders. Many times, we have boundary problems because we lack the initiative to propel ourselves into life. When the outside world sets limits on the child who is pushing against it, the child learns boundaries without breaking their spirits. Our spiritual and emotional well-being depends on our having this spirit. Being passive and operating with that modality never pays off especially in the family system when addiction is present. God will match our efforts, but He will never do the work for us. He wants us to be assertive and active, seeking and knocking on the door of life. We often confuse being passive with minding our own business. It can be easy to take a giant step back and call that separation a boundary with no honest communication to a boundary being set. It is vital to the process of lasting recovery that each member of the family actively sets healthy limits with one another and clearly communicates those limits in a loving way, detaching from outcomes
The Three C’s of Alanon
We Didn’t Cause It
Step one states, “We admitted we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanageable.” Addiction is a chronic disease, and there is nothing we can say or do to stop our loved ones from using or drinking.
We Can’t Control It
Step two states, “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” We realize there is nothing we can do to control addiction. Instead, we seek a power greater than ourselves to rely upon, just as our loved one is doing.
We Can’t Cure It
Step three states, “Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.” After we realize there is nothing we can do to control the addiction, we can begin putting it in the hands of our Higher Power.
Considerations for the Week
1. Have I experienced a lack of initiative to set healthy limits in my relationships? Am I currently under the delusion that if I put enough distance between myself and the problem that a boundary will eventually form with no action on my part?
2. In the past, have I set boundaries that were never communicated to the other party?
3. Has my lack of follow through with healthy limits in my relationships allowed other people to treat me in a way that conflicts with my core values?
The Family Afterward Meeting
Our next Family Afterward Meeting will take place on May 23, 2023 at 7 PM CST via Zoom. Please join us for a topic discussion meeting.
To join click the link below!
To stay up to date on current events, our monthly Family Afterward meeting, and to build relationships with others who have a loved one in recovery, feel free to join our private BRC Healthcare Family Afterward Facebook page.
To contact a family recovery coordinator or to volunteer to submit a “Family Success Story” spotlighting your experience, strength, and hope, please email us!
BRC Monthly Speaker Meeting
BRC Healthcare’s monthly speaker meeting is back! Join us June 10 for food, fellowship, and speaker Courtney W. Doors open at 6 PM with the meeting beginning at 8 PM. This event is open to the general public and all in the Austin recovery community. We look forward to reconnecting with each of you in Mark Houston Hall.
For those of you who are unable to attend locally, livestream over Zoom will be available.
Please note that our Zoom link has been fixed.